I didn't know whether to scream or cry tonight. I saw Dick at the gas station. I thought I was going to throw up and cry all at the same time. I walked quickly to the door and got on the phone with Amy for moral support and so I could make myself unapproachable. When I got back to my car to pump gas he had the nerve to walk up to me. He said Hi, long time no see. I pretended he wasn't standing there. He then said, fucking talk to me!... so I turned to him looked him in the eyes and said " If you don't get the hell away from me right now, you'll regret it. I wish for everything in your life to go horribley wrong so that you can feel half of what you have made me feel. I will never forget nor forgive you for what you did.So please, just go away and kill yourself.He walked back to his shitty piece of shit Harley and said nothing in reply to my statement. I got in my car clenched the steering wheel and screamed. Then driving back home I cried. I am proud of myself for facing him, it was a turning point for me i think. I just wanted him to know he didn't break me. Now the night is on repeat in my head. I am only thankful for the fact that I can't remember most of it, blessing in disguise I guess. The parts I do remember I wish I couldn't. So tonight, Im going to lay in bed and not get up til morning. Sleep helps everything. Shit, i am crying while typing this. I haven't talked about it in such a long time. Not a day goes by where I dont think about it...everytime I see a truck that looks like his my heart stops. Anywhere I go I always wonder if I'll run into him and tonight I did.
1 comment:
I have read over this piece four times. I keep trying to put myself in your shoes and wonder what I would have done had I been in your shoes and run into the SOB. I would hope that I would have had the strength and courage to face him like you did, but I'm not sure I could. I can't imagine how the blood must have been pumping through your whole body when you got back into your car and held onto that steering wheel. There is no doubt in his mind where he stands with you now. Worse than the crap you pick up on the bottom of your shoe walking along the streets of Vegas. Good riddance and great job! I am proud of you!
Post a Comment